How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is Suffering

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 A while back I read a post at “Emotional Shadows – Where all emotions are cared for.”

Balroop is talking about our faith…

In response to my comment Balroop still wanted to know…

 ‘Why do good people who have not wronged anybody, suffer?’

Let’s take a good look at a parent and child’s relationship.

1.  As a parent don’t you always…

  • Want the best for your children?
  • When you see them on the wrong path you try to correct them?
  • If they do run into trouble you’re right there for them?
  • The older they get the more mistakes they can make and you have NO control over them, you’re still there to help them get off there knees.
  •  You always try to protect them from anything bad?

 2.  Remember back when you were a child…

Didn’t you always know that your parents were there? (That’s called faith)  Anytime you had a problem you could count on them to be there and help in any way possible?

(Unless you happen to be one of those unlucky kids that got shit for parents.)

The MAN upstairs is known by the name of God where I come from.  (If you don’t believe in the MAN upstairs you might want to click away now or you could hang around for kicks and grins).

God says, “He loves me and I am his child.  I have enough faith to believe this is true; just as my parents told me…

“You are my child and I love you”.

(I would  hate the thought of being in this world without ANY BACKUP.)

That would be like a 2 year old being home alone.  (How scary for that poor kid)

3.   The Man upstairs is like we are as parents.  We try to protect our children, but there are times when bad things happen to them, because of their choices.


  • They choose the wrong friends to run around with and get their butts in trouble.
  • Maybe they choose to do drugs, even though we have tried to teach them to stay away from them.
  • Maybe they decide to drive too fast or mess with their cell phones while driving and have an accident.

Sometimes bad things happen because of the choices we chose to make.

This is not God’s fault, it is the choices that have been made.  In these kind of situations we have to remember…

That you as a parent are always there for your kids when they make the wrong decisions…

God is like that too, when we make the wrong decisions.

4.  On the flip side you have those unknown bad things like…

  •  Why would He allow an airplane crash?
  • Why would He allow children to die of a disease?
  • Why allow car accidents that you or your loved one are not responsible for?
  • Why is hunger allowed?
  • Why would He allow my sister to be murdered?

That is when we sit there, question and wonder why.

I can’t explain everything, but what I do know is this…

5.  When these bad things happen there is a reason and sometimes it takes time to see.

  •  Maybe we are going in the wrong direction and need to make some changes.
  • Maybe our loved one has fulfilled their purpose for being on this planet and it is time to go home.
  • Or maybe we live in a sinful world, where there are good people and really sick and toxic people.

Don’t forget the Man upstairs did say, “You have free will to make your own choices.  (This is where the sick and toxic people come in.)

  As parents you give that freedom to your children to make their own choices as they mature?

6. When those bad things happen and it isn’t a choice of your own.

Here is an example of bad things happening, but good comes out of it…

There is this top problogger by the name of Jon Morrow who is great when it comes to knowing how to blog and built a successful blog.

He is in a wheel chair, because he was born with Spinal Muscular Atrophy.

To a mother this is like the end of the world, but his mother decided she would make the best out of a horrific situation.

She worked with him; helped him in every way she could even though she was told that he would not live a very long life.

Now he is a top blogger and writer. He makes a great living, but also helps many people become the best they can be in the blogging world.

God had a plan for him and he is working that plan, instead of sitting back and grumbling about the cards he was dealt and saying, “Why Me?”

So when bad things happen to good people, instead of pitching a fit and saying, “Why Me or Poor me.”  Have some faith and say,

siffering 7“This is really a mountain to climb Lord, would you help me climb it?”

He is going to be there for you, like you are going to be there for your child if they have a mountain to climb and forgot there hiking boots.

After all…

Would you send your kid to school with out there lunch?  Maybe they forgot there back pack, wouldn’t you ‘being a loving parent’ take it to them rather than saying,

“Sorry kid I told you to remember everything.  Guess you don’t eat today”.

If your child ask for a sandwich are you going to give him/her a snake to eat?

I didn’t think so….

Bad things do happen to good people in this world, because of free will and we live in a sinful world.

That is why there is hungry, diseases, and terrible accidents…

So if you really want to blame God for something, blame him for giving us the gift of free will.

It is a gift, so use it wisely.

Are you using your gift wisely…

or sitting back and blaming the MAN upstairs for everything that goes wrong?

or are you letting Him help you when the shit hits the fan?

The choice is yours….

I would appreciate it if you would start by making a choice to comment and letting  me know what your thoughts are or if you have any more questions.

Shares are always nice too. 🙂

Thank you




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  1. Nirmal Anandh says:

    A Wonderful post, especially for the parents, who don’t know how to love them, treat them and care them. Yes i agree with your all the points. The bad things happens, only because of their choices. We are responsible for everything happen to them. We are the only source to lead our children. I enjoyed reading your post.

    I also felt while reading, my parents missed to lead me like this. But i don’t do that like my parents again. Thanks for sharing such an interesting and mindblowing post. I will make a share to my friends. Hope to see you back in my blog.
    Nirmal Anandh recently posted…Tips You Probably Haven’t Tried to Overcome the Writers BlockMy Profile

    • Hi Nirmal,
      Nice to have you come by. Glad that you enjoyed the post. Yes, bad things do happen and i’st how we react to them that really count. Glad to hear that you learned the ‘what not to do from your parents.’
      When it came to my parents there were and are somethings that i didn’t want to follow when it came to being a parent.
      Thank you for sharing the post with friend. it is always appreciated.
      Debbie recently posted…How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is SufferingMy Profile

  2. A lovely post, Debbie. I agree with you. This is a very difficult and touchy subject to handle, even with believers like ourselves. However, I think you’ve handled it marvelously. Thank you.
    Anne recently posted…Confidence Quotes 4My Profile

    • Thank you Anne. I do realize that when bad things do happen it is very hard to understand, but at the same time there is always a reason for everything. Sometimes it is a matter of holding onto faith and hope.
      They are like a life line when needed.
      Thanks again and have a great day, Anne.

  3. What a well written and thought provoking post. Unfortunately I cannot have children, however I was blessed to have loving parents who directed me well. I think a parents role is certainly to provide direction and also provide an emotional nest of security. Thank you for sharing.
    Steve recently posted…How Clinical Hypnotherapy Can Assist An Anxious MindMy Profile

    • Hi Steve,

      Nice to have to drop in and see that smiling face again. Sounds like your parents did a wonderful job of raising you. You do have great direction, I can tell by your blog.
      Thank you for sharing something personal about you. At least you don’t have to worry about those teenage years, when ever parent wants to adopt there kid out and ask themselves, “What was I thinking when I had kids.”
      Thank again and have a wonderful week.

  4. Good post Debbie,

    Our lives are a mixture of choice, luck, gifts, support, faith; and the attitude we take putting all that together.

    Thanks Anne
    AnneV. recently posted…The Sexes Are Not Equal, At Least With StrokeMy Profile

  5. Dear Debbie –

    Parents are much more distressed when a child is suffering. It is so painful.

    And after a certain age, there is not much we can do if they are having marital problems or have lost a job – (so many things happen)

    I guess the only way to deal with our feelings is to remember what we have survived and trust them.

    What do they say, “What doesnit kill you makes you stronger.”
    Corinne Edwards recently posted…HOW TO BE A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, INTERVIEW GUEST – from Media CreationMy Profile

  6. Hi Corinne,
    So happy to hear from you. Love that smiling face.
    Yes, it is very painful when you child is suffering and you can’t take that pain away.
    Trust them you say, that is right and sometimes it can be very hard and painful. But we all have to learn with our own learning curve as they say.
    You are right, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Sometimes I feel like Paul Bunnuns Blue Ox. 🙂
    Thanks Corinne lots
    Debbie recently posted…How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is SufferingMy Profile

  7. Hi Debbie,

    Lovely post indeed 🙂

    I know when I read that beautiful post at Balroop’s it made me think, and it’s good to see you write about it as well. There is always a reason to the way He works, and we are actually no one to question, isn’t it?

    If that be the case, I’d never overcome my mothers loss or would still be questioning as to why she died of cancer at such a young age, and that too lung cancer, when she doesn’t smoke! There can be SO many reasons. Just like you mentioned about Jon – he’s had such a tough life, but he’s come out strong – a real winner. That happened because He willed it and so did Jon. Some things are just destined to happen, and they will even if you do all that you want to stop them.

    What matters most is that we treat this life as a gift from God and appreciate each moment of our life in gratitude. Think of all that we have, rather than what we don’t. Think of the poor and feel lucky that you have so much more – there’s so much to be thankful for, isn’t it?

    Thanks for sharing this inspirational post with us. Have a nice weekend 🙂
    Harleena Singh recently posted…Don’t Miss These Tips on Home Safety for SeniorsMy Profile

    • Hi Harleena,
      I am sorry about the loss of your mother. I do know how hard that can be, even though I was very fortune to have my mother for many years.
      I do know that we can draw strength from God in the times we are hurting and don’t understand the why’s.

      Yes, this life is a gift I believe also that we have to appreciate and enjoy. Gratitude is very important, because you never know what is around the corner.
      I always wake up in the morning and stand, feeling the joy that i can even be in an up right position. Many people can’t even get out of bed.
      When i was a single mother with very little money I knew that i was very blessed, because I had my children.
      As they say we do have acres of diamonds around us, all we have to do is look in our own backyard.
      Thank you Harleena for stopping by and you always add to a post with your wisdom and understanding.
      Debbie recently posted…How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is SufferingMy Profile

  8. Hi Debbie,

    I do applaud you writing about such a difficult issue because most aren’t brave enough. None of us what to read or hear about suffering of children and our loved ones.

    But you did a good job! I always try to find a possible reason as to why bad things happen. The only scenario i can’t, is the abuse and torture of a child. It destroys that child’s life and most don’t have the support to ever recover fully and live depressing existence. I can’t see any good.

    I once heard years ago on a really old rap song that ‘hell is on earth’. Sometimes with such suffering and tragedy I think it’s true. Maybe the choices we make in life determines if we go to what an individual portrays as heaven?

    This post has left me with a lot to say and think about, so i’ll leave it there!

    Thanks for the brain poke.

    Naomi recently posted…Need To Up Skill? 4 Easy Ways to Learn New Skills for Your BusinessMy Profile

    • Hi Naomi,
      I hope your brain isn’t over working itself from this post. Bad things happen on this earth because of choices people make and the sin in the world.
      I to am bothers when I hear of the pain the children can be in from others.
      With love and compassion for others we can help ease some of the pain.
      As for heaven Jesus is the way. Remember the thief on the cross when Jesus died. He said he believed in Jesus and Jesus told him that he would see him in Heaven that day, because he knew he was our Savior.
      As for ‘hell on earth’ it does seem that way at times. But there is more good in this world than evil. Love can always win our over evil when we hold on to our Heavenly Father, like a small child holds onto there fathers or mothers hand while crossing the street.
      It does come down to choices people make in life.
      thank you for stopping by and breath deep and enjoy the gift of life.
      Debbie recently posted…How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is SufferingMy Profile

  9. Hi Debbie,

    I am wondering how I missed this post…so sorry for that. Thank you for responding to my question with such a wonderful post! How well you have mingled parenting and faith…I salute you for that.

    You are right, all happens with our own choice, I also agree that the ‘man up there’ has given us full freedom but is He always right in giving people the freedom they misuse? Is he right in giving all the power to those men who have created this sinful world? Isn’t HE all powerful to take action before it is too late? I appreciate Harleena’s point of view…why are certain children born with special challenges to face? Sometimes that makes me wonder whether the theory of past sins, of previous life have some role to play with such suffering which seems to be undeserved.

    Debbie, my questions are endless but despite all the answered or unanswered questions, my faith in the good guy, wherever He is, is invincible. I hope one day he will make me so capable that I would discern all His plans!

    Thanks for sharing such an insightful article.
    Balroop Singh recently posted…How Influencers throw their Nets!My Profile

  10. Hi Balroop,
    I do believe that when we get to our heavenly home we shall see all his answers and say, “WOW NOW I UNDERSTAND.”
    As for the men that created this evil world, what is important is the LOVE. We spend around 50 to 100 years on this planet called earth. I would rather do that and have to deal with the evil, and know that in eternity there will be NO evil larking around the corner. it is a small price to pay.
    He does let us know that those that are first in this world will be last in eternity. So as for the evil men, they need to hear us sing, “Our day will come.” That might take the smile off there faces.
    While I am here I’ll give it my best shot to share more good and love and smile to others. Maybe i can make someone else’s day just a little better.
    Keep the faith, because i can see his plan for you. You are making a difference in a mixed up world.
    Debbie recently posted…How To Triumph While You, A Loved One or Your Child Is SufferingMy Profile

  11. Good information thank u so much

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