The Zen of Actions For Happiness

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Actions Do Make a Difference 

“I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.” — Abraham Lincoln –   Planting the right seeds works the same way that positive thinking does.  So pluck the thistles of life with a dose of positive thinking and you will see the flowers bloom day after day.

How we react to any given situation makes a difference whether you are going to have a good day or not so good day.  For me I’ll take that good day every day, so I react in a positive way every chance I get.

Take for example you are driving to work and traffic is the pits.  Now you can get bent out of shape or you can sit back enjoy the slow pace.  Your actions in this situation are going to make a big difference in your day and most likely the drive home too.

George Bernard Shaw puts it this way: “People always blaming their circumstances for what they are.  I don’t believe in circumstances.  The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, they make them.” 

Sometimes we have no control over circumstances, but we do have control over how we react to them with our actions.

Say hubby comes home from work and he has had a pretty rough day.  He is not in the best mood.  Now you have 2 choices you can react to his mood or you can be understanding and give him the space he needs, but let him know you are there if he needs to talk.

If you react to his mood, this may very well lead to a disagreement or fight, but by giving him his space all well work out and you are going to be enjoying those flowers that you just planted, rather that walking on the thistles and hurting your feet.

Looking at any given situation on the positive side is always going to bring positive results.  It doesn’t matter if you are dealing with a debt collector or a crying baby.  It all comes down to a moment in time, why let it mess up your whole day?

Now you are saying, how do I keep from reacting?

Think first:  I know this can be a little tough, but with practice you can accomplish it.  Every time you go to open your mouth and let those words out, think about what you really want to say.  Feel with your heart, by putting yourself in the other persons shoes and think with your mind before speaking.  Plant those flowers.

Realize when in public there are stupid people out there.  We all know you can have that driver that thinks they are the only one on the road.  Feel sorry for them for being so stupid rather that reacting with anger.

 Those unhappy employees you have to deal with, rather than frowning back, give them a smile.  There either going to love the smile or think you are stupider than they are.  Either way it really doesn’t matter, because you’re having a good day.  You’re planting flowers again.

As Kenny Rogers would say, “Know when to walk away and when to fold”.  At times there really isn’t anything to say, because of another’s action and the best thing you can do for yourself is remover yourself from the situation.

Take the first exit you see and keep going, don’t look back!  

Know when to listen:  We all have those times when we need someone to listen to us.  We are not being negative, but in need of a sounding board.  By not reacting to this kind of behavior you are being a friend in deed. 

This person is going to feel safe with you and remember you as a good listener without judging them for their feeling.

Another example of how actions can affect your day and even your life.

Let us compare the human mind to a farmer planting on very fertile land.   He has 2 seeds.  One that is corn (which would be the positive in the human mind) and one that is a thistle (the thistles would be the negative side of the human mind). 

Which would you plant on your land?

I am comparing the human mind with the land, because the mind, like the land, doesn’t care what you plant in it.  It will return what you plant, now do you want to plant thistles when you react or do you want to plant the corn with your actions?

I go for the corn, because by planting the thistles with your actions is only going to bring you pain.  I don’t know about you, but pain is not one of those things that I look forward too.  I choose to ‘opt out’, what about you?

The person, who doesn’t care how they act or react to any given situation, doesn’t know where they are going and their thoughts are of confusion, anxiety and worry.  They are planting thistles and become frustrated, fear the pain from anxiety and worry.

The human mind is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land, but it works in the same way.  It doesn’t care what you plant, good actions or negative reactions to any situation.  It is going to return to you the same reactions, positive or negative.

What it comes down to is; the human mind is the last great unexplored continent on this planet.  It contains riches beyond our wildest dreams.  It will return anything we want to plant.

So, start planting positive actions and reactions to any situation and you will reap the benefits from those actions.

Smile when someone frowns at you!

Don’t be afraid to laugh and have fun with your actions!

When something negative happens, find the positive and opportunity in it.

Enjoy that drive in heavy traffic; you are getting practice slowing down.

Show compassion for that unhappy employee, family member or friend.

Spread the love with your actions!

What are you doing with your Actions and Reactions:  Planting corn and flowers or planting thistles?

 

 

 

 

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Comments

  1. Hi Debbie,

    Excellent post! Exactly, whatever we plant in our mind expands. It is our responsibility to choose positive thoughts that will help us grow. It is all in our attitude and how we interpret situations. Thanks for this my friend 😉
    Dia recently posted…How to improve your self esteem and self imageMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Thank you Dia, it makes me happy to hear that you liked it. “How we interpret situations” you say and you are right. There is always a positive. We just have to take the time to find it.

      Thank you for sharing your thought on my post. Always appreciate it.
      Blessings to you always,
      Debbie

  2. I Love to smile and do good deeds Debbie…and I love to see people happy…I’m not much of a gardener though. Thankyou
    be good to yourself
    David
    David Stevens recently posted…Living Life Today – Is your Life Imaginary or Imaginationary?My Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi David,

      I can tell that you love to make people smile and you are very good at making and helping them be happy. You always put a smile on my face when I see your picture.
      I thank you for that David, and thanks for stopping by.
      Blessings to you always,
      Debbie

  3. Wow! You beat me with this. I learnt a lot. Thank God I came around this morning to read this. I’ve to let others see this.

    I love this part the most: “what it comes down to is; the human mind is the last great unexplored continent on this planet. It contains riches beyond our wildest dreams. It will return anything we want to plant.”

    More grace,
    Chukwuka.

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Chukwuka
      Great to have you stop by. it makes me happy that you feel I nailed this one. Sure appreciate you saying it and sharing too.

      Yes, as humans we do not realize the possiblities our brains can accomplish. It is know different than learning how a computer works. The more we feed it the more it can do for us. When we feed the brain positive and plant good thing in the return is wonderful.

      Thanks again and blessings always to you, 🙂
      Debbie

      • Reading comments from others and your replies to them also lets me become aware of how others have viewed your post, Debbie.

        “When we feed the brain positive and plant good thing in the return is wonderful.”
        I agree, I could say it is somewhat similar to a young child being given information that gives a positive outlook on things. In return, that child will think of the world as a great place to live on.
        Feed the child with only negative thoughts and negative experiences, and I’m sure that child will look at the world as a sad and cruel place. In reality, many children suffer from this kind of upbringing, which is very sad.
        Felicia recently posted…2012 WSOP: Many familiar faces left in Event #2: $1,500 NLHMy Profile

        • Debbie Bills
          Twitter:
          says:

          Hi Felicia,

          Feeding a child with positive information is going to make them into a productive adult someday, instead of being sad and feeling sorry for themselves all there life. You are right it is not fair to a child having to live in a negative envirement. Health food for the mind and body makes us into very positive people. You are what you thin you are. Plant the right seeds and you will always have a beautiful garden.
          Thanks for sharing and blessings to you always,
          Debbie

          • Hi Debbie,
            I always visit your blog because I feel happy whenever I get to read a new post, or when I get to read the comments/replies from other people here.

            You know, there is a lot of sadness, negativity in this world that I am glad I have found your blog. Take for example in the news, we always see “bad news” and there are rare occasions when they feature “good news”. I guess that’s one reason why I wasn’t very interested in watching the local news each day, as it always shows problems in our society, the never-ending price hikes on gas, food, etc., and only a few good things are featured, and when there are good things in the news – it only takes a minute to report or even shorter..*sigh*

            I look forward to your next post, Debbie. Blessings to you and your family 🙂
            Felicia recently posted…No instant comeback success for Phil Ivey at the 2012 WSOPMy Profile

          • Debbie Bills
            Twitter:
            says:

            Hi Felicia,

            I have noticed that you have been visiting. It is very much appreciated and I will keep posting.

            Yes, there is a lot of negative in this world, but what I do is concentrate on the positive side. When out and about I smile at others to see if i can make there day a little better. It is the little things that we do for neighbors, friends or family that make a difference and I look for those little things to spread some sunshine.

            Life is what we want it to be. When listening to the news (sometimes) I take it for what it is, staying in touch with what is going on. It makes me see how grateful I am for the life that I have. There is always a positive side to find and that is what I do. Sometimes I do pray for those that are not so fortune.

            Thank you very much for the kind word and sharing your thoughts. You stay happy, hang around positive people and if you find something or someone is taking the sunshine away, just walk away.

            Blessings to you always and by the way, you did make my day with your comment. Thank you!
            Debbie 🙂

  4. You’re welcome. I’m glad I stopped by. 😀

  5. Hi Debbie,

    Love this post. You make such a good point. So important to look at the big picture, when confronted with negative situations. There is power in being silent! Thanks for sharing.
    Cathy recently posted…Meet Christopher Foster, author of The Raven Who Spoke with GodMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Cathy,

      Thank you for the kind words. Yes, it is very important to always look at the big picture in a negative situation.

      Thank you for bring this point out.
      Blessings to you Cathy,
      Debbie

  6. Hi Debbie,
    I agree with your post, it is never good to have our emotions influenced greatly by the negative situations that we encounter each day in our lives. It’s true that we can’t control everything that’s happening around us, but we can control our feelings toward that situation – either we can choose to be angry, or choose to be cool if we get stuck in traffic.

    I am normally a shy person, but I smile, say good morning or thank you when people (such as staff at the mall or restaurant) greet me, say good morning or something like that.

    Thanks for sharing this post!
    Felicia recently posted…WPT World Championship Super High Roller: John Juanda and many other big names on tonight’s final tableMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Felicia,

      Saying good morning is good and thank you are great! Keep up the good work. Sometimes we forget how important those little thank yous are. They can mean so much to any person.

      Controlling our feelings is very important. Think and then react instead of reacting and then having to say OOPS why did I do that?
      Thank you again for sharing those thought of wisdom Felicia. Always appreciate them.
      Blessings to you,
      Debbie

      • Hi Debbie,

        Yep, you are absolutely right. That’s why I always greet people whenever I can, by saying good morning, thank you, any polite response as I would like others to do the same for me. Well, if they didn’t return it, then it’s okay as well. The important thing is, I’m not rude.

        Anger is a passing emotion to let out some steam when we get stressed, but you know, it also raises our blood pressure – and I have read somewhere that it can lead to hypertension when you’re older. Why not remain calm, keep quiet, count to 10 or something, or analyze the situation first before blurting any negative words if you get stuck into a bad situation (such as traffic)? I have been in a car collision before (my mom was the driver while me and my sisters are the passengers), and you know, the one who rear-ended us still has the nerve to be angry at us, when in fact he was the one who’s at fault! In the end, when the police arrived, he was the one who apologized, saying he had a lot on his mind or something like that. Lucky for him my mom just let it go and wished him a safe journey.
        Felicia recently posted…Cory Zeidman crushed Chris Bjorin’s dream of a 3rd braceletMy Profile

        • Debbie Bills
          Twitter:
          says:

          Hi Felicia,

          Good for your mom and glad that you were all ok. Sounds to me like you treat people the way you want to be treated, which is the right way. Good for you.

          Angry is ok when we know how to control it. It is good to let off some steam at time. For me when I get angry and can get some really good house cleaning done. As i am cleaning I think about the situation and sort through it while doing something constructive. Works for me. And than I am ready to either let it go or sit and talk about it, if it is a person I am angry with.

          Thank you for sharing and have a wonderful day.
          Blessings to you,
          Debbie

  7. Hi Debbie. I love that quote from, Shaw. If we’re to become the prime cause of the effects in our life, and if we’re to lift ourselves above adverse internal conditions to effect real productive change, then we must create a new relationship with adverse circumstances.

    Whenever we respond to adverse external circumstances with an inner voice wailing, “WOE,” our ability
    to work through the matter is badly compromised.The more aware we are of what drives us to act as we
    do, the easier it is to make productive corrections. We create a marvelous opportunity when we recognize a negative tendency and deal with it without woeful self-condemnation. This is about being able to observe the flawed self dispassionately. The woeful attitude causes despair and gets in the way of the psychological repair.
    rob white recently posted…Self-Transformation vs. Self-ImprovementMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi rob,

      thank you for sharing you wisdom. I love this and it is always true, “if we’re to lift ourselves above adverse internal conditions to effect real productive change, then we must create a new relationship with adverse circumstances.” Creating a new relationship with adverse circumstances is very important. When we see the positive side we can create the right attitude to overcome any given situation.

      And being aware of ourselves is always important. Life is much easier when we get to know ourselves, the strenghes we have and also know our fears and weaknesses. By knowing ourselves we can adapt to any situation,.

      thank you again rob for sharing your wisdom. You are a wise man.
      Blessings to you always,
      Debbie

  8. Thanks for this encouraging post, I am so down recently due to some setback in career, difficult co-workers who is very hostile, personal life etc, your post has help me to change my perceptive
    david recently posted…Heartburn during pregnancy: beat it with 7 simple tipsMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi David,

      You are welcome. Life sometimes can hit you from all sides and when that has happened to me I read inspirational material and know that there is going to be sun appearing over those clouds.

      I do understand when it comes to hostile co-workers, that is how I got into blogging. I am very grateful for there actions or I may never would have found what I love doing, blogging.

      Good luck to you David, keep your chin up, because all thing do happen for a reason, just keep looking for the positive side of your trials.
      When it comes to personal life and relationships, the most important part is to keep those lines of communication open. Honesty is always the best way.

      Thank you for sharing and blessings to you always,
      Debbie

    • Hi David,
      I absolutely agree with you. This blog site of Debbie’s would really cheer you up whenever you’re feeling blue. 🙂
      Felicia recently posted…Cory Zeidman crushed Chris Bjorin’s dream of a 3rd braceletMy Profile

  9. Love, celebrations and singing. I need love everyday. Unfortunately I dont get it very often, so I learned to love a variety of people. I learned to celebrate with those who seem like they’d rather be alone. I learned to sing to people who are not only in a great mood, but to those who are somber and having issues even when they don’t want to hear it. I learned to love in a variety of ways, and it makes me happy.

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Laura,

      We all need some lovin every day. Sounds to me like you need to find some new people to invite to your party. The people that you are choosing don’t seem to love back. Loving in a VARIETY of ways is good, but you have to find the people that are willing and wanting to give back also. If we don’t find the right people for our party the wrong ones will suck us dry and than walk away to find someone else to take from.

      Thank you for sharing and wishing you all the love that you DO deserve.
      Blessings to you,
      Debbie

  10. Mitch Mitchell says:

    Pretty good stuff. It borders on the laws of attraction, saying what you put out is what you get back. I work on putting out positivity as much as possible and people seem to respond well, and I like that. At times it’s hard to get myself out of a rut but eventually I do come out of it by giving myself some thinking time. If it works for others it works for yourself as well. 🙂

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Thank you Mitch. Yes, is does border on the laws of attraction. People do forget they are what they think they are. Positive think is great and it does make for happiness, fun and laughter when you hand it out with every smile.

      When I hit those hard times like getting in a rut, I practice my smile with finding something positive in every situation and the sun starts to shine again.
      Thanks again for sharing.
      debbie

  11. Nancy Hoadley says:

    I’m the marketing assistant for Robert Scheinfeld, a NY Times bestselling author who just wrote a new book on how to be happy. It’s called “The Ultimate Key To Happiness.” It offers a v-e-r-y different approach to defining what happiness really is, and a very different step-by-step path to experience it all the time, no matter what’s going on around you. The Internet has gotten so complex. So many options. Can anyone here share ideas for how to get the word out there about this important new book? I’d love to hear your ideas. I’m sure there are tons of ideas I’ve never thought of before.

  12. Penelope Emmons says:

    Thanks for a great post, there’s a lot of wisdom there. I agree with you that it’s all about what we pack into the stream of life. If we waste time obsessing over the negativity of other people, we only harm ourselves.

  13. “I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.” — It looks like honest Abraham Lincoln can add ‘inspirational speaker,’ to his ever-expanding resume, hey Debbie? 🙂

    Ps. It is a little off-topic however I’ve only just now noticed the cover of your book with the kitty cat in front of the mirror – adoreable! 🙂

    • Hi Darcy,

      Thank you for stopping by andf sharing your wisdom. I always appreciate this. Yes, Abraham Lincoln can add ‘inspirational spreaker’ to his resume. 🙂

      We can learn alot looking back into history. Those people were really on top of things. Maybe there lives weren’t so full of running around trying to keep up with the pace of the world back than that they had time to stop and THINK! 🙂

      Thanks again and you have a wonderful day,
      Debbie

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