The Shocking truth about people you might hang out with.

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“Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.” By Voltaire

Life can seem as though it is a shipwreck at times, but when we look for the positive in the troubled waters we will find the sun shining brightly on the horizon.

We all have those days when it feels like the boat is sinking, and some fool forgot to put the oars in the boat, and the life jackets weren’t even given a thought before setting out on the journey.  

We get to the point where it is a choice of either sink or swim.  Me not being a swimmer I have to keep a positive attitude at all times by picking the people I associate with carefully, because I sink like a rock in water.

How do I do this when adversity strikes my Bow?

I see Life as a Party. Now you want to know how in the world I can see life as a party!  This is how –

You invite a lot of people into your life.  Every day we meet new people and become friends.  Or maybe it is your family, parents, sibling, cousin or aunts/uncles.

When we met new people we can get a feel from that first impression, but remember not to judge to quickly or you could be throwing one of your oars out of the boat.  Sometimes it takes awhile to really get to know a new person and see what is really in the inside.  It is what is inside that really makes a different.  (Looks can be deceiving)

When it comes to our family be careful not to judge them by the past.  As children we remember all the little fights we had with them as kids playing in the back yard.  This is not who or what they are now.  Yes, we may think different than they do, even if we grew up with the same parent, but this is OK.  See them as an adult and look at the positive things they bring to your world.  Siblings can be the best friend you are ever going to have when you concentrate on the positive about them, rather that the negative part that you had trouble with as a kid.  There love is unconditional, so love and respect them for who they have become as an adult.

Some people go.  Some of these people will always be in your life and then again some will find it is time to go in another direction.

Friends do come and go in everyone’s life.  You have the friends you went to school with and then you lose contact with them.  You have the friends you get to know through your kids.  Then there are always the neighbors when you move into that new house.  Friends from your church or other actives you may get involved in. 

As you sort through these new and old friends, remember to keep in touch with the ones that are there for you when in need and the ones that you are there for when they need you. 

When it comes to dating and falling in love, enjoy this time and have fun getting to know a possible spouse for your future.  Don’t rush this relationship.  Making a life time commitment to someone takes time and wise choices.  Face the fact that boyfriend/ girlfriends are going to come and go before you find the RIGHT one.

Some people join you.  Then you have the people that do decide to join you.  You have the same interest, and things just seem to fit together with them like fine china in a hutch or tools in a tool box.

These are the people that you probably want to stay in touch with and enjoy.  It just feels right and you are all rowing the boat together as you sing along.  The world is like sun shine on a beautiful day.

Some laugh with you.  Some are fun to laugh with when you need that in your life, making you happy on a cloudy day.

We all need a little silly in our life at time.  Do be careful that these aren’t the friends that can never be serious when you need them to be.  Are they going to stand up in the boat and capsize it when you just need them to sing alone and row the boat with you?

 Some don’t show up.  Then you have those that you thought maybe you could count on that forget to even show up.  Especially when you need them the most.

With these kinds of friends you need to go the other way and learn from the experience and don’t look back.  They are all about themselves and their egos are as big as the day is long.  They are sure to capsize the boat or throw the oars overboard, when they can swim, but you can’t and there are No life jackets aboard.

Some stay and help you clean up and those usually are the uninvited ones.  They are the faithful ones that you didn’t even know where coming, but you find you can always count on them to be there when the day is done.

These are the important friends.  Whether the boat is moving along in clear water or the storm is throwing you all around they are there to help you navigate those fun times and those rough times. 

They are the swimmers who won’t leave your side until you are on that shore safely.  They will even give you there life jacket if necessary.

Life is for celebrating when you have the right people and the right attitude.  

This is why it is so important to pick the people you want in your life that can help you shoot higher, laugh louder and look forward to tomorrow.  Find people who aim high, think positively, genuinely are about you and do make you laugh.  And you do the same for them

When we have mutually caring relationships, we understand what psychiatrist David Viscott meant when he wrote, “To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.

Have you ever had that party where the food just didn’t turn out the way you wanted it too?  That is like inviting the wrong people to the party. 

I have sibling that I know longer see or have anything to do with.  Some are alcoholics and very toxic to me.  I do not need negative people in my world; they are like a party crasher. (I do leave the door open if they ever do change, I would listen.)  It is ok to pick your family instead of being stuck with one.

If you’re having trouble seeing life as a party and only seeing it as a shipwreck, check out who you are hanging out with.  Once you get the right party goers coming to your life party, the fun begins. 

When that boat starts sinking, you can sing in the lifeboat, because you have all the RIGHT party goers with you and happy people love to sing.  And the swimmers will risk there life for you if need be.

So get crackin’ and work on that party list before the shipwreck. 

 

 

 

 

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Comments

  1. Corinnwe Edwards
    Twitter:
    says:

    Debbie, you speak a great truth here:

    “Some don’t show up. Then you have those that you thought maybe you could count on that forget to even show up. Especially when you need them the most.

    With these kinds of friends you need to go the other way and learn from the experience and don’t look back. They are all about themselves and their egos are as big as the day is long. They are sure to capsize the boat or throw the oars overboard, when they can swim, but you can’t and there are No life jackets aboard.”

    How did you get that smart? Tookj me a long itme. I thought longevity meant friendship. Years do not matter. Loyalty and love do.

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Corinne,

      Hey, it has taken me a long time to get smart Too! Guess it is time I share my wisdom life has taught me. In life we make choice, some are good and some not so good but when we learn from those not so good they really are not bad choices.
      When it comes to friends yes, the loyalty and love are very important.
      And by the way I do want to thank you for sharing all your knowledge, because I have been learning from you and you are a great support to me.
      Thank you again and blessings to a very sweet loving and loyal lady,
      Debbie

  2. Hi Debbie,
    “I have sibling that I know longer see or have anything to do with. Some are alcoholics and very toxic to me. I do not need negative people in my world; they are like a party crasher. (I do leave the door open if they ever do change, I would listen.) It is ok to pick your family instead of being stuck with one.”

    I so agree with you on this one. I have some family members who I feel that I’ll never be close to them. I have aunts and uncles who think they know me very well, to the point that whatever I do, they have something bad to say about me. I’m so glad that my mom and sisters support me in everything I do.

    I only say hi and talk in a shallow conversational manner to those who I think have a negative attitude towards me. At least, I wasn’t raised to be rude. If I wasn’t taught proper manners, I think I would’ve ignored them completely.

    Thanks for sharing this thought-provoking post!
    Felicia recently posted…Daniel Negreanu’s Weekly RantMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Felicia,

      You are welcome and thank you for sharing your story. You are doing the right thing when it comes to those aunts and uncles. Sometimes we just have to say, “What ever and let things go in one ear and out the other.” (And with a smile on our face because we know better. LOL) I am very happy for you that you have a good support system with your sisters and mother. It is very important when we have someone to support our dreams.

      Thanks again for sharing and stopping by with your story.
      Blessings to you always,
      Debbie

      • Hi Debbie,
        Yep, my mom and sisters have always been there to support me or cheer me up if something bothers me. Of course, I’m pretty much there for them when they need me as well (even if I know I’m just bothering them, LOL!). My mom always says that I should focus on things that make me happy, and not dwell on those that make me sad or feel bad about myself. After all, we should strive to be happy as long as we are not making anyone else unhappy because of us, right?
        Felicia recently posted…WPT World Championship Super High Roller: John Juanda and many other big names on tonight’s final tableMy Profile

        • Debbie Bills
          Twitter:
          says:

          Hi Felicia,

          Thanks for sharing and you mom is right. We should always try to focus on the good things, they do make us happy. And when we run into those negative things we should always look for the positive in them.

          You say, “we should strive to be happy as long as we are not making anyone else unhappy because of us.” If another person is unhappy or having a bad day, we can have empathy for them, but we are more of a help if we are happy. By being happy you can help the not so happy person see the positive side of any situation. Being unhappy never serves a purpose, it just makes others around us feel bad or even worse than they already may feel.
          Thanks again for sharing and blessings to you always,
          Debbie

  3. Is someone having a party – I better be invited – because too much FUN is never enough!

    Wonderful post – It’s all about attitude and inviting the balcony people into your life and leaving the basement people in the basement. We can pick our friends but we can’t pick our family….so pick wisely!

    It’s learning how to deal with people in a positive light – we can say things to harm or we can say things to uplift – I chose the uplifting method.

    In gratitude,
    Nancy
    Nancy Shields recently posted…The #1 Rule to Manifest Your Dreams and Goals: PatienceMy Profile

    • I agree with you, we can’t pick our family, but we can pick our friends. That’s why even if I only have a few friends in my circle, I am sure that they are the truest of friends that anyone can have and I am lucky to find them in my life.
      Felicia recently posted…Daniel Negreanu’s Weekly RantMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Nancy,

      You are right about that. You my firiend are always invited to any party I am having. You can count on that. I like the way you put this. ” It’s all about attitude and inviting the balcony people into your life and leaving the basement people in the basement. Basement people, that is good!!

      I to chose to say things to uplift. Sometimes I might mess us but when this happens I do try to fix it.

      Thank you Nancy for sharing and adding to the post with the balcony people.
      Blessings to you always my friend.
      Debbie

  4. What a Happy theme here Debbie…..nicely scripted., thankyou
    be good to yourself
    David
    David Stevens recently posted…Is Time on your side or is it slipping away without notice?My Profile

  5. Great metaphor about the party–loved that. I’m already having more fun in my life just from reading that.
    Galen Pearl recently posted…Ever SmallerMy Profile

    • Debbie Bills
      Twitter:
      says:

      Hi Galen,

      Glad that I could help out with your party. it is wonderful how life can change when we hang out with the right people and have the right attitude. Isn’t life just wonderful. it is fun just getting out of bed in the morning.
      Blessings to you, always,
      Debbie

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