How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty Kids

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 When I was a kid my mother didn’t mix any words.  She didn’t worry about hurting my feeling or even my butt if that is what it took.

Now days raising kids is a whole new ball game.  Is this a really good idea?

I read this article that refers to how to ask a kid to clean there room.  This is what they say you should teach your kid, so they show respect and are not rude;

The kid says, “I’m, not going to clean my room”.

Instead mom teaches the kid to say, “I don’t want to clean my room, because I’m too tired right now.  May I please do it tomorrow?”

Give me a freakin break.  We all know that that room is not going to get cleaned.  You can bet your next pay check that the kid is going to come up with a new excuse tomorrow.

As for misbehavior some moms say they offer rewards for better behavior; Using ice cream, books and inexpensive toys.

What are you thinking?  I don’t know about you, but if my parents had used reward for my misbehavior I would have collected rewards like a squirrel stores up food for the winter.

Here is what my mother taught me.  (Part of this is from an unknown author).

To appreciate a job well done.  “If you’re going kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning the house!”  I learned to take care of my own problems and handle any situation that came my way.

Religion.  “You better pray that comes out of the carpet.”  I learned that when things looked pretty bleak and you thought your life was about end, praying helps.  Hey, I’m still here, so it does work.

Time Travel. “If you don’t clean up your act, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week.”  I’m one that like’s to enjoy every moment, so you can bet I cleaned up my act.  Who would want to miss out on a week of their life?

Logic.  “Because I said so, that’s why.”  I learned that some battles you just don’t want to pick, because you know that it is a loss loss situations.

If you do something stupid there is price to pay.  “If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going shopping with me.”  I learned to think twice, so I wouldn’t break my neck, but in the process I learned to face fear a few times and hope for the best.

Foresight:  “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”  When they invented panty liners I was first in line to buy them suckers.  I always have clean underwear now.

Irony:  “Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about.”  I learned to be tough and only cry when I knew it would do me some good.

Osmosis:  “Shut your mouth and eat your dinner!”  I learned that peas up the nose DOES NOT work.  For some reason they do not go into your digestive system.

Contortionism:  “Will you ‘look’ at the dirt on the back of your neck!”  This came in real handy after I had my own kids.  They still think I have eyes in the back of my head.

Stamina:  “You’ll sit there ‘till all that spinach is finished.”  As a mother myself I can sit through any soccer game, dance recital or boring actively my own kids may be in without blinking an eye.

Weather:  “It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.” I learned that the weather can get ugly, but as long as you come out alive that is what counts.  Having good insurance is always a plus.

Physics Problems:  “If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you would you listen then?”  Maybe it is true that the sky could fall someday, so I need to keep an eye on that.  So far, so good…

Hypocrisy:  “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times – Don’t exaggerate!!!  I learned to be who I am and nothing more.  When you lie or exaggerate it is too hard to remember what you said last.

The circle of life:  “I bought you into this world, and I can take you out.”  Yes, you better enjoy every day; you never know what’s waiting around the corner.

Behavior modification:  “Stop acting like your father.”  If you really don’t like how your relatives act or your friend, stop acting like them and be who you want to be.

Envy:  “There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do!”  Be thankful for your parents, because none of them are perfect.  Leave home at an early age if it gets too bad.

Anticipation:  “Just wait until we get home.”  Always be on good behavior when out if public, you don’t want to end up in the loony bin or jail.

Receiving:  “You are going to get it when we get home!”  Be careful what you ask for you might receive it.

Medical science:  “If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to stick that way.”  There are some things the body was not meant to do.

Think ahead:  “If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job.”  I was lucky enough to be good in math.

ESP:  “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you’re cold?”  Others may think they know you better than you know yourself.  Just go with them if need be.  You can always take that sweater off later.

Humor:  “When that lawnmower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”  Shoes are a good thing, other that when you’re swimming.

Becoming an adult:  “If you don’t eat your vegetables you’ll never grow up.”  After becoming an adult I wished I hadn’t eaten those veggies.  Being an adult isn’t always fun, stay a kid as long as possible.

Genetics:  “You’re just like your father.”  Sometimes there isn’t much you can do about some things.

Roots:  “Do you think you were born in a barn?”   Does this mean that I have something in common with Jesus?

Wisdom of Age:  “When you get to be my age, you will understand.”  I’m not as old as dirt yet, so I’m still waiting for that wisdom.

Justice:  “One day you’ll have kids…and I hope they turn out just like you!”  This did happen to me so take this one very serious.

In many ways I do know my parents weren’t as dumb as I thought they were back then.  They did instill value and morals in me.

But at the same time they threw in fear.

If you are having trouble with your kids being a smart @%^ and disrespecting, just maybe you need to put some fear in them.

Stop and think about life it’s self.  As adults we don’t go out and break the law, because we know we could end up in a court room and in the slammer.

Is modern day parenting really putting fear in today’s kids?

 Kids want and need boundaries.

So if you want the smart mouth to stop but the fear in them.  Don’t say, “Honey, please go clean up your room.”   Say, “It is time for you to go clean up your room, or I will move in a kid that really appreciates YOUR ROOM.”  End of story!!!!

Instead of giving them a $500.00 birthday party… how about letting them know if they don’t clean up their act they won’t make it to their next birthday…

Teach them the meaning of LIFE.  Otherwise you may end up with them never moving out of your house or moving back in when they learn about the real world.

So are you putting a little fear in your kid’s life, or making them believe life is just a joy ride?

 

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Comments

  1. Hi Debbie,

    Nicely written indeed 🙂

    Yes, a few parents prefer tempting their children with rewards, but I don’t think that’s a good idea as the kids become used to that and won’t work if not given any reward. Perhaps it’s better to explain things and chalk out boundaries and layout rules for them that they need to follow.

    However, do reward them, but not for things they do, instead, just like that so that they don’t miss out on those. A little fear in their minds is needed so that they remain disciplined or else they’d never learn. I agree, you need to make them so strong and fill them up with courage and your love that they can face the world and life as such, without your help.

    A lot for parent’s to do, but it’s essential I think. 🙂

    Thanks for sharing. Have a nice week ahead 🙂
    Harleena Singh recently posted…How to Make a Successful Blog in 3 Simple WaysMy Profile

    • Hi Harleena,
      Wow, sorry i am a little slow in responding to your wonderful comment. Maybe i can start this week of right. (Many interruptions last week)
      Yes, I don’t believe it is a good idea to reward children for bad behavior. I can just see them later in life working for someone. The boss comes up and ask them if they have completed the work he/she gave them. They say, “oh, still haven’t gotten around to doing it, but I was wondering if I could have a raise in pay?” Maybe i am caring that a little to far, but you never know.
      When i was a teenager if I was wanting the car for the evening I would clean the house and my reward was that I got to use my parents car for the evening. Rewards to work when used in the right way.

      You are right all kids need boundries, since even as adult we have our boundries, whether it is at our work of employment, our communties or countries. There are alway rules and boundries.
      You are welcome and thank you for stopping by Harleena. It is always great hearing your poin of view.
      Have a goood week
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  2. I am SO sending your blog link to my daughter whose son is almost two! When I was raising kids, I always thought that “because I said so” was a perfectly reasonable explanation and the only one they needed.

    When my daughter objected to carrying in the groceries one time (without my help) she asked my what MY job was. I said that my job was making the money to buy the groceries and put a roof over her head. Her job (along with her siblings) was to put the groceries away and keep the house clean.

    As you can see, I like your style!

    This is a great article, and so are all your others! Love this blog!
    Galen Pearl recently posted…Clean TowelsMy Profile

    • Thanks Galen for the kind words. I am just really getting this blog off the ground, so I shall try my hardest to post more good stuff.
      Thanks for sharing your story about your daughter and the groceries.
      Sounds like you are my kind of mother.
      I was talking to a mother the other day that has a teenage daughter. She was telling me that her daughter was 2 hours late getting home. I told her that I sure would ground her little #$%^. I was told that you should not ground a kids anymore. Reason being that what she did was a mistake and we as parents make mistakes. She was just thinking of having her clean the garage as punishment. I don’t know about you but when I was a kid that was just part of my job. Actual i did the house, my brothers did the garage.
      The world does and is changing. Not sure if this is good or if we are going to have a lot of serial killers running around. Many not that bad.
      I really not sure about this modern day parenting.
      Thanks again for stopping by.
      Take care now and keep up the great work on you blog.,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  3. Always a good read Debbie! I can’t say I agree with 100% of it but a lot of it does make me think and agree that’s how I was brought up and will try to do the same with my kids. It’s not easy but there are things we can do to make it easier!
    Joel recently posted…Headway 3.5 ReleasedMy Profile

    • Hi Joel,
      I am learning from what I read and the research along with being a grandmother that kids are being raised all together different these days.
      I wonder if this is good or bad. I do believe that the more we learn the better off we are, but at the same time we have to sort through what we are reading and say, “Is this what I really believe.”
      The most important part of raising kids is that they know they are loved, not with what we can give them, but by our actions.
      As for raising kids it is a very rewarding job, but can be pretty hard at times.
      Thanks Joel for sharing and I know you are a good daddy.
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  4. Very entertaining read! Many of the one-liners ring a very familiar bell :-] Luckily, as your post implies, we all – well, many of us anyway – grow up to eventually understand that ALL children have parents, that ALL human behavior (even our parents’) is either a loving response or a cry for help, and that to help rather than to cry for help works smiles better. My sis and myself had our turning point when we discovered that both of us believed to be the less fortunate of the two.

  5. Cheryl Ragsdale says:

    Hi Debbie,
    It seems like kids and parents have a different point of view on respect. It’s important to be respectful of other people’s boundaries. But it’s also important that kids learn to respect that when someone says, “Now!”, they mean NOW.

    The world is a much different place than it was when we grew up. No doubt the children of today will be harvesting the fruit of the parenting they received 20 years from now.

    • Hi Cheryl,
      Boy I believe you hit the nail on the head with, “No doubt the children of today will be harvesting the fruit of the parenting they received 20 years from now.”

      It is rather scary to me. Sometime I wonder what has happened to the parents common sense. It seems as though there isn’t any.
      When i would tell my kids ‘now’ they could tell by the look on my face and tone of my voice that they better start moving or there world was about to end. LOL
      Thanks Cheryl and have a great day,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  6. Thanks Beat for sharing what your sister and you learned. As parent we do have to learn when our children have that cry for help. If as a parent we feel things are out of control and we are the ones crying for help figure out were to find that help.
    When children grow up into adults it is fascinating to see how different they can see things. Or they see things the same. We all have to understand parents (most of us) did the best job we knew how.
    Thanks and have a great day,
    Debbie
    Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  7. Corinne Edwards says:

    Dear Debbie –

    This is your most hilarious post. Takes me back.

    You forgot-

    “I brought you in and I can take you out.”

    Every psychologist would have a heart attack if they read this. But it really is the way things used to be..

    One of my favorites is
    “If you’re going kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning the house!”

    I had 4 boys. One rule was no wrestling in the house. If it was 27 degrees below zero , I would put them outside with no coats.

    It always worked. They came in in 5 minutes and were quiet as mice.

    Makes me wonder how those kids survived us.

    • Hi Corinne,
      Sorry in being so slow to respond, but I have been working on fixing my FB account. Thanks for sharing your boys trips out side in the cold. I can remember telling my own that I brought them into this world and I could take them out. One time I said this to my middle kid and she told me she would call social service. I told her that I would get the number for her, but she needed to know that is was her they would take out of the house, not me. And she would be living with strangers. She decided that wasn’t a good idea after all.
      Actually I think our kids are much better at survival skills than the young kids of today. We made them tough!
      Thanks Corinne for sharing and again sorry for being so slow. It has been just one thing after another. Guess that is what you call life. LOL
      Hugs,
      Debbie
      p.s. at least I still have my house and not mud in my basement like many do here in Colorado. I’m grateful!
      Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  8. Kids need a bit of a challenge. It’s hardship that actually makes us grow. Today’s kids have it too easy. When they’re faced with the real, hard world, they don’t know how to handle it.

    I know some parents who say their kids are their best friends. Nonsense! I’m not my kids’ friends. I’m their parent. Perhaps we can become friends when they’ve grown up. I love them with all my heart, but I’m going to TELL them to clean their room when it’s dirty. 🙂
    Anne recently posted…Confidence And ForgivenessMy Profile

  9. Hi Debbie,
    I definately agree with your comment that children need and want boundries. When they are young, they constantly test these boundries and it is easier to correct them. As teenagers, it is a different story. I agree that consequences make clear for certain behaviors are important, and the parent needs to follow through on enforcement. It is also important however, the keep the dialogue going. I always made it abundantly clear to my children that blatant disrespect would not be tolerated. They still did many of the things that teenagers go, but are respectful adults today.
    Enjoyed the post!

    Anne

  10. Hi Ann,
    Boundaries and respect. You hit on 2 important parts of raising kids. If you haven’t taught them those 2 things by the time they are 5 your pretty much going to be screwed when they hit those teen years.
    Enforcing the rules is a must. What kids don’t know (and this is good) that when it comes to enforcing the rules sometimes it can hurt the parents more than the kid. I know there were times when I really felt bad about having to enforce something. But i am glad I held my ground. They are better for it.
    Thanks you for stopping by and blessing to you.
    Debbie
    Debbie recently posted…How To Take Charge Of Your ‘Know It All’ ‘Obnoxious’ and Snotty KidsMy Profile

  11. My brother recommended I may like this web site. He was entirely right.
    This publish truly made my day. You cann’t consider just how so much
    time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

  12. I just found this site today and really enjoy reading here. I have eight kids and we homeschool. I really agree that we are parents first. Friendship is nice, but I have found it doesn’tt come until the age of 18. By then, boundaries and respect have been firmly established. My 3 oldest and I are great friends and enjoy doing stuff together. I look forward to reading more from you. My youngest is 6 months old, so looking forward to doing this another 18 years. Sorry for the book:-)

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