A Mothers Worst Nightmare

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 When My Little Girl Was Abducted

I couldn’t comprehend this was happening to me.

One minute my little girl is right beside me.

The next minute she is gone…

I ask myself through tears, “Will I ever see her smiling face again?”

I think about the days leading up to this moment …

The days I got upset with her for little things that really never mattered.
For making a mess with her toys and not wanting to pick them up when it was time.
She was driving me crazy fighting with her little brother.
Not eating her food and spilling her milk.

All I wanted was a break from my little girl…

How I wished I could go back in time…

  • I would help her pick up the toys, teaching her the easiest way to do it singing while we worked.
  • I would teach her how to fight nice with her little brother, then hug her with all my heart.
  • I would know that when she got hunger she would eat, as for the spilled milk it would have been a lesson teaching her how to clean it up.  Instead of me getting angry and cleaning it up.
  • I would realize that I didn’t need a break from her, but she may need one from me, because I am always concentrating on the wrong moment and things.

Not the moments of laughter and silly funny things she does…

  • Like playing with her dolls, talking to them like they are a group of girls together.
  • When she stops what she is doing and gives me a big hug saying, “I Love You Mommy.”
  • All those little moments of learning she goes through every day.
  • Seeing those little hand prints on my sliding glass door and getting out the Windex to clean them and the refrigerator door, because she is always curious.

(I remember the time she opened the refrigerator door and the light was out.  She looked inside asking the food if they could see and what they were doing.  I stood there in the distance smiling at her imagination, and innocents.)

  • The sound of those little feet running from her brother and even me at times, laughing all the way.  Oh what a beautiful sound it was to hear the pitter patter of those little feet.
  • I miss the little noises when she is around and the sweet smell of her hair.

Dear God I forgot to pay attention to those precious little things…

This can’t be happening I say…

I was doing everything wrong with my little girl…

I forgot to have fun with her…

Learn from her; how wonderful life is and full of mystery…

My heart is aching for another chance to change the time I had with my little girl. 

  • To love her, cherish her as a person.
  • To stop and listen to her; getting to know who she really is.
  • Concentrating on the right things about my little girl, not the mistakes she makes or the times I had to tell her to do something twice or three times.
  • I ask myself, “Why wasn’t I more patient with her?”

God please find her; let her be OK, give me another chance to be the mother you want me to be.  I have learned my lesson about what is important and what isn’t.

I have learned my lesson when it comes to the battles to pick with her and what isn’t going to make a difference a day or week from now.

Please give me another chance to make things right…

I lay here in bed crying, praying that this nightmare would end.

Please God give my little girl back.

I promise to be the best mother I can, yes I will make mistakes, but I can and will be better.

Please, please give her back to me.  Give me another chance.

Suddenly I felt this shaking and someone saying,

Wake up, wake up!”

I wake up to my husband shaking me; realizing this is a dream.

As I lay there crying; repeating over and over…

“Thank you, thank you for letting this be a nightmare.”

Now I run to her bedroom checking on her; making sure she is really there.

 I lean down; smelling her hair, kissing her as my tears drip down on her pillow.  Tears of relief and joy.

And then…

 I realize this wasn’t a nightmare, but a wakeup call I shall forever be grateful for.

You see I am the lucky one, my child was not abducted (only in my dream), I learned from it and had a second chance.

I had a second chance to really enjoy that little girl I lost in my dream; learning what is really important when it comes to our kids.

They are the most precious things you can every have in your life.

As a parent we can learn so much from them when we take the time….

  1. Watch them every day…
  2. Listen to them when they play…
  3. Look at them when they are sleeping…
  4. Love them when they make mistakes, because they are only learning…
  5. Never abandoning them….(Unless they are still living with you at the age of 40 and they can take care of themselves)

Our children are our future; help them learn to build a good future for themselves.

Start with…

  1. Loving them and letting them know how much they are loved.
  2. Teach them to respect themselves and others by your example.
  3. Teach them it is people that are important and relationships, not material things.
  4. Teach them to be humble and grateful.
  5. Teach them we are all different and this is wonderful.
  6. Teach them that life is a gift to enjoy by living it with happiness and understanding.
  7. Teach them to treat others like they want to be treated.

Ok, let’s be honest here…

As a parent we are all going to make mistakes, there are going to be days our kids drive us crazy. When those days hit keep smiling finding the positive in them.

 Look for the humor at all times.

As long as we love our kids; understanding no one is perfect, they are going to come out OK!

So start enjoying your kids, take the time to enjoy and laugh about those little things that aren’t going to matter in an hour, a day or even a week.

You will be amazed that when it comes to putting them to bed at night you can do it with a happy smile on your face, instead of a look that says, “Sure glad that day is over.”

Remember there are NO guarantees in life, we take it one day at a time making the most out of every minute.  Don’t wait for a life crisis to wake you up and miss the real fun of raising your kids.

P.S.  By the way don’t forget about all those electronic devices that interfere with really paying attention to your kids.

Those phone calls that can wait.
Those text messages that don’t need answered right away.
Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest are always going to be there when they are sleeping or in school.

It’s your turn now…

Are you enjoying your kids…

or riding out the storm day after day until they are on their own?

 

 

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Comments

  1. Hi Debbie,

    Gosh! I was scared when I read about your child being abducted, but was relieved when I read that it was only in your dream 🙂

    Yes, such dreams can give us nightmares and I’ve had my share too when I was raising my kids too. They used to horrify the life out of me, though there was just a few months they came, not after that. Perhaps disturbed sleep or surroundings add to these nightmarish dreams.

    I agree with you there – enjoy your children and give them all your attention, make them your priority – everything can and must wait! I’m glad it was always family for me first, and then anything else.

    Thanks for sharing, and have a nice weekend. Happy New Year 🙂
    Harleena Singh recently posted…Keep Moving Forward – My 3rd Blog AnniversaryMy Profile

    • Hi Harleena,
      Sorry Harleena I didn’t mean to scare you, but many times wake up calls can come in many ways.
      I do remember one time when my 2 older girls were riding their bikes and came running home letting me know that someone stopped and was trying to get them over to there car.
      Life can change so fast that we need to enjoy those kids as much as we can, for they do grow up quickly.
      I can tell by your blog that you are a wonderful mother and how much love you have for your family.
      It is a mater of keeping those priorities straight.
      Thank you for sharing and for the love you spread.
      hugs,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  2. Hi Debbie, your post reminds me of “Grownups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them” (Antoine de Saint-Exupéry). When the explaining by our children doesn’t do the trick, as you illustrate, it often takes an adult version of wake-up call, in nightmare on in broad daylight. Whoever gets to the point of epiphany is among the lucky few. Your post will boost that number, so thanks on behalf of the lucky ones :-]
    Beat

    • Hi Beat and hope you are having a good start to your New Year.
      You are right when it comes to grownups never understand anything by themselves. We can get so caught up in our own world that we forget to listen and pay attention.
      As I always say, “a clean house is really nice, but there are times that one that looks lived in is much happier and fun.”
      I am hoping that my post will give a few people a wake up call and see what is really important sits right in front of them.
      Thank you for the kind words and have a wonderful week end.
      Blessings to you,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  3. This is a really touching and eye-opening post. I read it all with rapt attention.
    Anne recently posted…Find Out If You Think Like A LoserMy Profile

    • Hi Anne,
      Glad that you see the post as an eye-opener. My hopes are that many other parents will see it the same way and it can change there thinking a little and maybe there life.
      Have a wonderful week end and thank you for stopping by. It is always appreciated.
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  4. Debbie

    Great post to get the correct point across.

    As the kids grow older…as parents we also have to learn to ‘let go’. Let them go and discover the world for themselves!

    Andrew
    Andrew recently posted…9 Reasons Why Your Website Will Never Make MoneyMy Profile

    • Thank you Andrew. Coming from a top blogger I take that as a real complement.
      When it comes to the letting go you mention, yes I have to admit that was one of the hardest things for me to do.
      When I fall down with it I am lucky enough that they remind me they can stand on there own to feet now. They just like knowing that I am there if needed.
      Once we do let know it is fun watching them discover there own world.
      Thanks again for sharing and the reminder of letting. It is so important.
      Have a great weekend.
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  5. Hi Debbie,

    I’m glad to hear this was only a dream. Reading about these sorts of events always makes me feel so uncomfortable (as I’m sure it does for many). It really is a parents worst nightmare – the ‘not knowing’.

    Although at the beginning I didn’t want to finishing reading your post I’m glad I did. I suspected it would have a good ending and it’s given me a good reminded about the important things in life.

    And to stop getting annoyed about the little things that really do not matter!

    Thanks

    Naomi
    Naomi recently posted…5 Easy Steps to Turn Your Passion into Your JobMy Profile

    • Hi Naomi,

      I am so glad you finished reading my post. Have to love happy ending. Just yesterday my daughter was telling me that her husband’s sisters kids were walking home from school and someone stopped and tried to get them to there van. Of course they have been taught to run, which they did, thank heaven.
      It is a different world out there these days and that is why I believe it is so important to enjoy those little moments and not worry about the little things that really aren’t going to matter even in a few hours.
      Thank you for sharing and stopping by.
      Blessing to you,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  6. Dear Debbie –

    A painful post. Hard to read until the end. You never ever get over the loss of a child. Never.

    And you do go over and over in your mind all the things you could have done differently. For years.

    I hope it reminds some mother to be more patient.
    Corinne Edwards recently posted…GREAT BOOK IDEA – but you need help?My Profile

    • Hi Corinne,

      I am so sorry that this post was painful until you got to the end..
      When I was writing it I wanted parents to understand how important it is to concentrate of the right thing when it comes to kids. What is really important.
      Thank you for sharing your feelings while reading and adding “I hope it reminds some mother to be more patient.”
      Patience is so important with those little one and many times with the big kids too.
      Thanks again Corinne and hugs to you always,
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  7. Great post Debbie! As our second child approaches arrival in the next week or two I will take these lessons and make sure I learn them.

    Thanks for the reminder!
    Joel recently posted…Why I No Longer Recommend HostGatorMy Profile

    • Hi Joel,
      Congratulations to you and mommy. This great and thanks for sharing the arrival of another member of your family.
      Glad you liked the post and hope there was some helpful info in it for you.
      Love is the most important part in raising kids. Action are what shows the love,
      Keep me posted on the arrival of the new little one. I am go excited for you and mommy.
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

  8. Good post Debbie, and very glad it was a nightmare and not reality.

    You are right on to point this out as a wake up call. It is so important not to stress ov the little things like spills or noise; and to focus instead on the big things. Like the absolute joy a child can bring to your life!

    Anne
    AnneV. recently posted…Making Your Resolutions StickMy Profile

    • Hi Anne V. Yes, i was very glad to wake up from that dream and know it was onely a dream. We can learn from dreams some times and this was one of those.
      Those little things that seem to bothers us as parents need to stop and really take stake if it is going to matter in even an hour.
      Kids grow up fast and it is the fun things you remember. I remember one time when I was going to clean my kitchen floor and the girls were sitting at the table having a snack with some juice. I told them if they were going to spill do it now, before i cleaned. My middle one picked up her glass and turned it up side down. I really had to laugh, since I had ask for it. LOL. We still laugh about it to this day.Thanks for sharing and stopping by.
      Debbie
      Debbie recently posted…A Mothers Worst NightmareMy Profile

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